I love milestones, and they also send me a little bit crazy.
Last month was a biggie! My son turned 18 and graduated from high school - ON THE SAME DAY!!
When something big like this is approaching I whip myself up into an emotional frenzy and share this heightened state with everyone around me. Leading up to the 'big day' I couldn't stop talking about how I was feeling, and about how much I was going to cry, actually crying, and generally over-sharing to whoever would listen. I apologise to not only my family and friends, but also to my neighbours, to the lovely people who work at the local fruit shop, and to my workmates!
The Graduation was fantastic, and I cried of course. I drank champagne with my friend whose daughter started Kindy on the same day as my son and we cried happy tears as we watched them enjoy their graduation together 13 years later.The 18th was wonderful too - and we survived the birthday party in better shape than some of the guests!
I've always thought that being a parent is in so many ways about letting go. At each stage of your child's life you need to let go that little bit more. You let go when you send them to preschool, to school, on sleepovers and to camp. You let them make their own choices and mistakes, and hope that when they return to you they will be ok. They will be a little changed from each new experience, and so will you.
When my son turned 18 and finished school I celebrated the beautiful man that he had become and grieved for the gorgeous boy that he was. I celebrated that I was with him to share in this important day and my heart burst with pride and love as I watched him share this special day with his friends and with our family.
Now, 5 months later as I finally finish this post I'm feeling a lot calmer and accepting of this next stage in my life as a mother. He is away with friends for a week and I'm missing him, but I know that he's having a great time and I want nothing more than for him to be happy, peaceful, and surrounded by people who he loves, enjoying this exciting time in his life, when so much is possible. I know that the letting go will continue, and more tears will be shed, however a little rest for the moment feels sweet and I will savour it.
Vanna xxx
I love the sense of freedom and exhilaration in this image - letting go can be difficult but once you've done it, it feels pretty good!
(I found this photo on google images).
